So, I’ve been thinking. Which isn’t unusual for me, though even I’ve been doing it more than usual lately. What I’m wondering is, is LA a true desert, as in, one that offers growth and peace and centeredness and all of that, if you enter it correctly (a desert for the soul, not in terms of annual rainfall, for all of you literalists out there).
A desert is a place of deprivation, a place where you lack something (or things) essential or desirable for your survival.
Coming back from my retreat, I find myself wanting…no, craving…silence and solitude. And I don’t have it, or at least, I don’t have it very much. And I can survive without it, or with the little that I have. For most people, silence and solitude is the desert, is the place of renunciation, of lacking something. For me, at least right now, that’s the place of fullness. And I live in LA. Ye gods!!! So right now, for me, the place of deprivation is here, in the fullness of ways to avoid myself that is LA. But is this a desert? My desert? A desert for me? I find myself deprived here, but not in a usual way. Can I find a way to enter this that isn’t somehow destructive? I don’t know, but I find myself musing here a lot lately.