Of The Words

It’s hard for me to blog right now. I just can’t find the words.

I have most of a post written about how much I love the Olympics. And it’s true. I do love them. They bring back fuzzy memories of sitting with my mom on the couch and cheering away. And there are so many awesome sports out there. Modern pentathalon, anyone?

In fact, I love the Olympics so much that my excuse for not blogging is that I’ve been too busy watching our gymnasts get their hearts broken, and how can you think of blogging at a time like this.

But really, my heart has seasons. There are times to share, and times to refrain from sharing, times for words and times when they’re not the way to make something significant.

I always knew there was a reason that the book of Ecclesiastes is one of my favorites. Seriously, no one just tells it like it is like The Prophet in Ecclesiastes. What has value? Oh, right, NOT A WHOLE LOT. I like people who are honest with me, even when it’s hard.

I’m not just struggling to blog lately, I’m struggling to write at all. The Novel is more than 3/4 of the way re-written, but I haven’t been able to do much on it in the last few days. I’d hoped to finish the rewrite before school starts (next Wednesday) but that looks more dubious as the days go by.

You know, that might be the key. Last week, I pushed to get a lot done on The Novel and worked more intensely than I would have otherwise (which isn’t very intense, given The Job and The Husband, not to mention The Olympics and The Gymnasts). I felt fine while I was doing it, but now I feel like the words wore out. This happened before, the last time I tried to do a push on The Novel.

So maybe that’s the lesson, that I only have so many words, at least of the ones that are close to my heart, per week or month or year. If I use them up, it’s fine, but I have to wait for the well to fill again.

Fill, well, fill.



Filed under My Days

8 responses to “Of The Words

  1. I have been completely obsessed with the Olympics! And my writing is suffering. But that’s okay. I’m telling myself I needed the break anyway.

  2. I was smiling the whole way through this post. Not because I’m happy that you’re struggling to blog but because I felt like I could hear your voice in the way you wrote this. All your excitement over the Olympics translated over here. I felt like I could “feel you,” if that makes any sense.

    I had a feeling you are someone who gets stoked on the Olympics, from the comments I’ve seen you leave here and there in blogland. Kirk and I got to watch a reply of the AMAZING opening ceremonies while we were holed up in a swank hotel room eating room service on the night of my graduation, but other than that, we have had to live vicariously through the headlines and video clips online. We were so tempted to buy a TV and get cable when we came home from the hotel, let me tell you.

    It’s good to hear I’m not the only one who goes through these seasons of wordlessness. Blogging has been hard for me of late, too. I just don’t have much to say. That post I put up at 3AM last night took me ALL DAY to write. The going was just so slow. And really, since I was writing about events that happened a week ago, it had really taken me a week to work out the words. I hate that. But then I open up a post like this, from you, and it makes me feel like it’s okay.

    You are the second person I’ve ever met that loves the book of Ecclesiastes. Makes me smile, the way you wrote about it. Especially the part where you merged into ALL CAPS. : )

  3. Heather–yah, a break is good. It’s just that when I go to bed after midnight and wake up before 7 that I begin to wonder if it’s really a “break” after all 😉

    Christianne–Thanks–it’s nice to know my voice comes through here. And I had to miss the opening ceremonies–Dave and I were having dinner with our pastor and his wife (does that make us extra holy?). I asked Dave if we could order cable and cancel it in a couple of weeks, but he said, “Probably not.”

    Who’s the other person who loves Ecclesiastes? Anyone I know? We’re few and far between, us Ecclesiastes-lovers. Though I had a friend once whose favorite book was…Habbakuk, I think. They’re farther between, let me tell you.

    Words are harsh masters, I think. They don’t come when you call, they don’t march nicely, they don’t even start spewing randomly. Sheesh.

  4. Mmmm . . . she was a Torrey student, a sophomore during the last stint I did over there. I guess that means she just graduated. (Holy dang! That is so crazy to me.) Anyway, her name is escaping me right now, but if I remember, I’ll let you know. : )

  5. I wonder if I had her in TA class…

  6. Oh! I just remembered her name. I’ll tell you tomorrow. : )

  7. Tammy

    Ha, you think no one likes the book of Ecclesiastes huh? That book and the book of Proverbs were two of my most favorite books in the Bible, except lately it has gotten dusty from lack of use. But i love that book, mostly because it appeals to the inner pessimist in me.

    It is sorta depressing, i like that. It is a poetic book that makes you really think.

    Another one of my real downfalls would be Song of Solomon. Now there’s a vice.

    I think it is cool that you like Eccl. You are an interesting soul Sarah.


  8. sarah, this made me smile too. not because of the wordlessness (which is all too painful a season to be in when “writer” is a word you use to describe yourself), but because of phrases like: , given The Job and The Husband, not to mention The Olympics and The Gymnasts.

    and yeah, the whole “to everything there is a season” thing. right now is the season for gymnasts and not-words. you read l.l.’s post about that, didn’t you? about how words work lacking, so she just took time to soak, bathe, and wrap herself in the heartbreaking beauty around her.

    so enjoy them olympics.

    oh yeah, and i’ll see you tomorrow. :o)

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